I think in
Two different verses
While composing
What seems
To be
Nothing for nobody
That will soon transform
Into
Something for somebody.
Our fearless leader
Chewing gum,
Or maybe her cheek,
All the while
Trying not to
Bite her tongue.
Her partner stares
Like a porcelain doll
With painted lips
And eyes that look
Beyond who and where
To what and why
But not all here.
We talk about
What we haven’t done
And what won’t be,
I think,
While I deflect
Others’ gazes that
Fall upon my
Supposed expertise;
Not unlike you
But different, somehow.
Mind leaden with
Meat and bread,
Dreams of past
Pillows laid upon,
Past ceilings stared at,
As I gaze upon
The patchwork roof
With odd blue boards
And uniform sheets
Of what might be
Asbestos or
Just my imagination.
Composed 06/19/2012
Author’s note: It was a complicated day. I was having quite a bit of trouble with language, and dealing with the pressure of being the only person in the training group with any TEFL experience (with graduate coursework on top of that). I have had my experience come back to haunt me: It sets expectations quite high and the ideas of who I am in the mind of others is not something I can easily live up to, leading to disappointment. There was quite a bit on my mind this day, to say the least.
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